13 Ways To Pick Yourself Back Up When You’re Down

Let’s be honest, life throws curveballs. One minute you’re sailing high, conquering goals and feeling unstoppable, the next you’re staring up at the bottom of a metaphorical pit, wondering how you even ended up down there.

Maybe it’s a job rejection, a relationship setback, or simply a string of bad days that’s got you feeling defeated. Whatever the reason, you’re stuck in a funk, and the sunshine seems a million miles away.

Listen, I’ve been there. Remember that time I spent months pouring my heart into a freelance project, only to have the client disappear into thin air, taking my hopes and a hefty chunk of my income with them? Talk about a pit.

But here’s the thing – we all have those moments. The key is not staying down there, but figuring out how to climb back out, dust yourself off, and keep moving forward.

And that’s exactly what this article is here for: overflowing with 15 practical tips to help you climb out of that pit, dust yourself off, and start shining again.

So, grab a cup of coffee (or tea, or your favorite pick-me-up!), and let’s get started on your journey back to feeling awesome.

1. Acknowledge Your Feelings (It’s Okay to Not Be Okay)

We all have this innate desire to project a veneer of strength and positivity. But sometimes, life throws a wrench into that well-oiled machine, and we find ourselves plummeting into the depths of discouragement.

The first step to climbing back out? Acknowledging those feelings – the frustration, the sadness, the anger – whatever it is that’s got you down.

Pushing away your emotions is like trying to hold a beach ball underwater. It might work for a little while, but eventually, it’s going to come bursting back to the surface, often with a vengeance.

Remember, feeling down is a normal human experience. Don’t judge yourself for not being your usual chipper self.

Take me, for example. I spent months pouring my heart and soul into this freelance writing project. I envisioned it as my big break, the one that would propel my career to new heights.

But then, radio silence. Emails went unanswered, calls never returned. It felt like the rug had been ripped out from under me.

Denial was my initial reaction. “This can’t be happening!” I kept telling myself. But the longer I pretended everything was fine, the worse I felt.

The turning point came when I allowed myself to feel the disappointment, the frustration, even a touch of anger. It wasn’t a pleasant experience, but it was necessary.

Once I acknowledged those emotions, it cleared the way for something else: acceptance. Acceptance that things hadn’t worked out the way I’d planned, but also acceptance that this wasn’t the end of the road.

It became a stepping stone, a chance to re-evaluate my goals and explore new opportunities.

Here are some ways to acknowledge your feelings:

Talk it out: Vent to a trusted friend, family member, therapist, or even your awesome pet. Sometimes, just verbalizing what’s bothering you can be incredibly cathartic.
Write it down: Journaling is a powerful tool for processing emotions. Put pen to paper and let it all out – the good, the bad, and the ugly. You might be surprised by the insights you uncover.
Embrace creative expression: Maybe writing isn’t your thing. Express your emotions through art, music, dance – whatever creative outlet resonates with you.

2. Reframe the Narrative (Shift Your Perspective)

Our brains are wired for negativity. It’s a survival mechanism leftover from our caveman days, when focusing on potential threats could mean the difference between life and death.

While it served us well back then, this negativity bias can be a real downer in modern times.

When you’re feeling discouraged, it’s easy to get stuck in a loop of negative self-talk. “I’m such a failure,” “Why do bad things always happen to me?” These thoughts will only drag you down further.

So, it’s time to reframe the narrative, to challenge those negative thoughts and find a more empowering perspective.

Let’s look at the example of a job rejection. It stings, no doubt about it. But instead of dwelling on the fact that you didn’t get the job, consider it an opportunity.

Perhaps the role wasn’t a great fit after all, and this opens the door for something even better.

Maybe the interview process gave you valuable insights into what you’re looking for in a job, helping you refine your search and direction.

Here are some tips for reframing the narrative:

Challenge negative thoughts: When a negative thought pops into your head, don’t just accept it as truth. Ask yourself, “Is this thought helpful?” or “Is there another way to look at this situation?”
Focus on the positive: Even in the most challenging situations, there are always silver linings. Look for the positive aspects, no matter how small they may seem.
Reframe the setback as a learning experience: What can you learn from this experience that will help you move forward?

3. Celebrate Your Wins (Big or Small)

When you’re feeling down, it’s easy to fall into the trap of focusing solely on your failures and shortcomings.

But here’s the thing: you are capable and accomplished! Take a moment to celebrate your wins, no matter how small they may seem.

Aced that presentation at work? Made it to the gym for the third time this week? Conquered your fear of heights and rode that Ferris wheel? Those all count!

We often underestimate the power of acknowledging our accomplishments. It’s like giving ourselves a little pat on the back, a reminder that we are worthy and capable.

These small victories, when celebrated, can build momentum and fuel our motivation to keep moving forward.

For a while, I felt like I was stuck in a professional rut. My days seemed like a monotonous blur of deadlines and uninspiring tasks.

I felt utterly unappreciated and discouraged. Then, I stumbled upon a suggestion for keeping a “win” jar. Every time I accomplished something, no matter how small, I wrote it down on a piece of paper and tossed it in the jar.

At the end of the week, I’d take some time to read through those little slips of paper. It was a powerful reminder of my accomplishments, big and small.

Seeing all those achievements listed out there, black and white, helped me realize that I wasn’t actually stagnant – I was making progress, even if it felt slow at times.

Here are some ways to celebrate your wins:

Keep a “win” jar or journal: As mentioned above, write down your accomplishments, no matter how small, and revisit them when you’re feeling discouraged.
Reward yourself: Did you finally finish that daunting project? Treat yourself to a celebratory coffee or a relaxing bubble bath.
Share your wins with loved ones: Tell your friends and family about your accomplishments. Their support and encouragement can be a powerful motivator.

4. Reach Out for Support (You Don’t Have to Go It Alone)

We were meant to connect. Humans are social creatures who thrive on support and encouragement. So, when you’re feeling down, don’t isolate yourself.

Reach out to your loved ones – friends, family, a therapist, heck, even your awesome pet! Talking about what’s bothering you can be incredibly cathartic, and their support can give you the strength to keep going.

Sometimes, simply knowing you’re not alone in your struggles can make a world of difference.

There’s a sense of comfort and validation that comes from sharing your burdens with someone who cares.

And who knows, maybe they’ve been through something similar and can offer valuable advice or simply a listening ear.

Here are some ways to reach out for support:

Talk to a friend or family member: Sharing your struggles with someone you trust can be a huge relief.
Seek professional help: A therapist can provide a safe space to talk about your challenges and develop coping mechanisms.
Join a support group: Connecting with others who have been through similar experiences can be incredibly helpful.

5. Sweat It Out (Exercise is a Powerful Mood Booster)

Let’s talk endorphins, those feel-good chemicals our bodies produce during exercise. They’re nature’s happy pills, and they can be a game-changer when you’re feeling down.

Even a brisk walk, a yoga session, or a quick dance party in your living room can significantly improve your mood and energy levels.

Now, I know hitting the gym might not sound appealing when you’re feeling defeated. Believe me, there have been countless times when I’ve dragged myself to the gym, feeling utterly unmotivated.

But here’s the secret: even a small dose of exercise can work wonders. The key is to find an activity you enjoy, something that gets you moving and your blood pumping.

6. Do Something Kind for Yourself (Self-Care Isn’t Selfish)

When you’re feeling low, it’s easy to neglect yourself. But self-care isn’t selfish – it’s essential! Taking care of yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally equips you to handle life’s challenges.

So, take a long bubble bath, get a massage, or indulge in your favorite comfort food (in moderation, of course!). Do whatever makes you feel pampered and appreciated.

Here are some self-care ideas to consider:

Relaxation techniques: Practice deep breathing exercises, meditation, or progressive muscle relaxation to calm your mind and body.
Connect with nature: Spend time outdoors in a park, forest, or by the beach. Nature has a way of restoring and rejuvenating the soul.
Engage in hobbies: Make time for activities you enjoy, whether it’s reading, painting, playing music, or spending time with loved ones.
Prioritize sleep: Aim for 7-8 hours of quality sleep each night. Sleep is essential for both physical and mental health.
Healthy eating: Nourish your body with nutritious foods that will give you sustained energy.

7. Unleash Your Creativity (Express Yourself and Let Go)

Sometimes, the best way to deal with negative emotions is to channel them into something creative.

Write a poem, paint a picture, play some music – whatever allows you to express yourself freely.

You might be surprised by the insights and emotions that come pouring out.

During that freelance project fiasco I mentioned earlier, I felt completely lost and discouraged. My initial drafts were met with rejection, and self-doubt gnawed at me.

So, I pulled out my old paints and started creating. It wasn’t about creating a masterpiece, but about allowing myself to express the jumble of emotions swirling inside me.

The act of putting colors on canvas, of letting my emotions flow freely, was surprisingly therapeutic. It helped me clear my head and gain a fresh perspective on the project.

Here are some ways to unleash your creativity:

Journaling: Write down your thoughts and feelings without judgment.
Art therapy: Express yourself through painting, drawing, sculpting, or any other artistic medium that resonates with you.
Music: Play an instrument, sing along to your favorite songs, or even compose your own music.
Creative writing: Write a poem, short story, or even a song.

8. Break Down Big Goals into Smaller Steps

Feeling overwhelmed can be a major roadblock to getting back on your feet. So, if you’re facing a large goal that seems impossible to achieve, break it down into smaller, more manageable steps.

This will make the task less daunting and allow you to experience the satisfaction of completing each step, building momentum and motivation.

For example, let’s say you want to write a novel. Instead of staring at a blank page and freaking out, set a daily goal of writing 500 words.

Each day you hit that goal is a small victory, and before you know it, you’ll have a decent chunk of your book written!

Here are some tips for breaking down big goals:

Identify your goal: What do you want to achieve?
Break it down into smaller steps: What smaller, more manageable tasks will help you reach your ultimate goal?
Set realistic deadlines: Don’t try to do too much too soon. Set achievable deadlines for each step.
Track your progress: This will help you stay motivated and see how far you’ve come.

9. Find Inspiration (Let Others’ Stories Light Your Path)

Sometimes, all it takes is a spark to reignite your inner fire.

Seek out stories of people who have overcome challenges similar to yours.

Read biographies of inspiring individuals, listen to motivational podcasts, or watch documentaries about overcoming adversity.

These stories can serve as a powerful reminder that you are not alone and that difficult times don’t have to define you.

There have been countless times when I’ve felt utterly defeated. But then, I’d stumble upon an article about someone who had persevered through seemingly insurmountable obstacles, and it would rekindle my hope.

I still remember that time I was struggling to launch my freelance writing career. Self-doubt was a constant companion, whispering negativity in my ear.

One rainy afternoon, I curled up with a biography of Maya Angelou. Reading about her resilience in the face of immense hardship was a powerful motivator.

It reminded me that even the most successful people face setbacks, but it’s their unwavering determination that ultimately leads them to triumph.

Here are some ways to find inspiration:

Read biographies or memoirs of inspiring individuals.
Listen to motivational podcasts or audiobooks.
Watch documentaries about overcoming adversity.
Follow inspirational figures on social media (but be mindful of curated online personas).
Connect with mentors or role models.

10. Practice Gratitude (Shift Your Focus to the Positive)

Gratitude is a powerful tool for shifting your perspective and boosting your mood.

Take some time each day, whether it’s in the morning or before bed, to reflect on the things you’re grateful for.

It can be anything – a supportive family, a good friend, a delicious cup of coffee, the fact that you woke up this morning with a chance to start fresh.

For a while, I kept a gratitude journal. Every night, I’d write down three things I was grateful for that day. It might seem simple, but it made a huge difference in my outlook.

Focusing on the positive aspects of my life, no matter how small, helped me appreciate the good things I often took for granted.

Here are some ways to cultivate gratitude:

Keep a gratitude journal: Write down three things you’re grateful for each day.
Practice mindful appreciation: Take a moment to savor the simple things in life, like a warm shower, a beautiful sunset, or a hug from a loved one.
Express gratitude to others: Let the people in your life know how much you appreciate them.

11. Help Others (Giving Back Can Lift You Up Too)

Helping others is a fantastic way to take the focus off your own problems and create a sense of purpose.

Volunteer your time, donate to a cause you care about, or simply do something nice for someone in need.

12. Embrace the Power of Nature

There’s something undeniably calming and restorative about spending time in nature.

Take a walk in the park, go for a hike in the woods, or simply sit in your backyard and soak up the sunshine.

Immersing yourself in nature can reduce stress, improve your mood, and boost your overall well-being.

Here are some ways to connect with nature:

Spend time outdoors: Even a short walk in the park can make a difference.
Go for a hike or bike ride in nature.
Practice mindfulness in nature: Pay attention to the sights, sounds, and smells of the natural world around you.
Try gardening or spending time in your backyard.

13. Remember, This is Temporary

Here’s the most important thing to remember: feeling down is temporary. Life is a rollercoaster, with ups and downs.

This challenging time you’re facing right now? It won’t last forever. You are strong, capable, and resilient. You’ve overcome obstacles before, and you will overcome this one too.

There have been countless times when I’ve felt down. But here’s the thing: I’m still here. And you will be too. Hold onto the belief that things will get better, and trust in your own strength to weather this storm.

Bonus Tips

While these 13 steps can help you navigate an immediate period of discouragement, building long-term resilience is key to weathering future challenges. Here are some additional tips to consider:

Develop a positive self-talk habit: Challenge negative thoughts with empowering counter-narratives.
Practice mindfulness and meditation: These techniques can help you manage stress and cultivate inner peace.
Build a strong support network: Surround yourself with positive, supportive people who uplift and encourage you.
Prioritize healthy habits: Regular exercise, a balanced diet, and quality sleep are essential for physical and mental well-being.
Develop healthy coping mechanisms: Find healthy ways to manage stress, such as yoga, journaling, or spending time in nature.
Celebrate small wins: Acknowledge your progress, no matter how insignificant it may seem.
Practice self-compassion: Be kind to yourself, especially during difficult times.
Seek professional help when needed: Don’t hesitate to seek professional help from a therapist or counselor if you’re struggling to cope on your own.

Remember, building resilience is an ongoing process. By incorporating these practices into your daily life, you’ll be better equipped to handle life’s inevitable setbacks and bounce back stronger than ever.

Final Thoughts: You Are Not Alone

Feeling discouraged is a normal part of the human experience. We all face challenges and setbacks that can leave us feeling down.

But the important thing to remember is that you are not alone. There are countless people who have faced similar struggles and emerged stronger on the other side.

Use these tips as a starting point, a toolbox filled with resources to help you pick yourself back up when life throws you a curveball.

Believe in your strength, trust your resilience, and remember that even the darkest nights eventually give way to a brighter dawn. So, keep your head held high, and keep moving forward. You’ve got this!